Cruising Krabi

We had just hopped off the Perhentian Islands of Malaysia knowing that it would be hard to repeat paradise. . so we were prepared for whatever.
We arrived by plane and caught a bus past the Krabi township to the beach Ao Nang. In typical backpacker style we didn't know where to stay and ended up with packs on in the sweltering heat trudging up and down the strip. We decided quickly on a bungalow, knowing it would just be for the night. All afternoon and evening we strolled from one side of the strip to the other door knocking on every decent looking hotel. The best part about the low season are low season rates - and all hotels have them when they are pushed. We finally settled on a new resort called the whitesand - for 800baht which is really cheap for a decent place, we got ourselves a finely kitted joint with a rooftop pool to boot, and a view of the beach with the incredible rock that borders the town.

Do you get this shot below?
The image is actually flipped - a reflection from the pool. You can see the chairs in the above image.

The town itself is busy and bustling with the Thailand we knew from our last visit to Phuket 3 years ago - tailors, jewellery, restaurants and clothing vendors.

The Beach isn't bad - not really a swimming zone - but more a get a beer and people watch kind of scenario. When tide is out it is busy with the lcoals collecting shell fish and digging for crabs.

On the last day in Krabi we were walking down the beach when a Thai girl approached us about getting a massage.. well damn.. we haven't done that yet >> and if you go to Thailand, the massage is a must do activity.

Desh decided to go for a manicure instead - but we both ticked up the initial foot scrub. Are you ticklish? We are - and man, what a thing to do for 30 minutes when it feels like someone has a feather in their hand and is intending to torture. To tell the truth, somewhere in my 20s I've lost the ticklish foot nerves - but I got a lot of satisfaction watching the tears rolling down Desh's cheeks.

Getting the Thai massage is something incredible - these people literally climb aboard you with their muscular boney frames and prod every part of your body until it is internally bruised and ready to be dragged back to the hotel. In fact - the police should let go of the old phone book beatings - and hire Thai Masseuses to extort information instead.
The part that had me laughing and crying was the legs. Have you ever seen someone enjoying a chicken drumstick so much that they refuse to let go until every piece of meat had been sucked off? That's just what my massage was like - 20 minutes on each leg picking/digging between the muscle and bone until I was convinced one more horse bite could finish me off.

Once last note - I snapped these chefs at the beach in their uniforms fishing.. I guess what you buy for dinner is fresh after all.

Perhentian Paradise

A picture can paint a thousand words.. and in this particular location there can be no exaggeration - just look at the ocean as we sit in the boat stunned by what we are arriving to stay on for the week.

The Perhentian Islands are situated 600kms away from Kuala Lumpar. Our day started very early in order to get there in the morning before the chalets fill up - as you can't reserve rooms here. In high season, backpackers are known to sleep on the beach waiting for their turn at one of a handful of resorts on offer. The trip out there is slightly like the amazing race, with many detours and options to outsmart other teams. We started ours with our Indian hosts ordering us a 5am taxi, which ended up being a friend of theirs in his own car. He told us on the way that if police pulled us over we were his friend and he was giving us a ride... Mmmm.. Sounds likely as we don’t even know his name and are sitting in his back seat nervously while his 'proton' vibrates at 130kmh.. Upon delivery to the airport we had to pass the money under the seat so the coppers wouldn’t catch on to 2 white people being in the backseat of his car at 5am being a legit scene. We then hopped onto a flight for 600kms to the postcard looking coastline where we caught a taxi for 70kms to a jetty called Kuala Besut. From here we hopped onto a 40 minute speedboat that was like a spa pool with 2 oversized V6 engines on the back..

Desh found those spa pools could really get up and go - leave the hair straighteners at home.


A few jabs of the throttle and we were in paradise - Perhentian has 2 Islands - but most of the beaches are quiet and dozey, except for long beach which is where the backpackers go for a bit of a party up atmosphere, snorkelling and diving.. apart from that you really must chill, catch up on a good book or 3 and work on that golden syrup tan.

This is what we decided on, and to do so checked into some really cool Chalets at Panorama Resort. On check in you have to sign the register which gives your name, country, profession and AGE >> it was the latter that concerned us as the whole page ranged from 19-22.. We were here for a week and the youngins kept coming and coming.. The whole being born in 1990 saga scared us to no end.. but we dealt with it through a method known as denial. Shoot, do a feel the tickle of a 30 crisis coming on?

Our Chalet..

Our Chalet after hiring George Lucas to direct the shot with the Jedi lightsaber.

The wildlife on this Island is awesome - There are flying chipmunks.. flying.. between chalets and trees
Monitor lizards the size of alligators crawling about and CLIMBING trees with their huge claws..
I was having a beer at the end of the week and a humming bird hummed past me (first beer in a week, possibly hallucinated that).
The biggest Spiders we'd ever seen were everywhere, with webs that span 3 metres between tree trunks all over the place.. Holy - it’s like being in a David Attenborough documentary/Steve Irwin run for your life situations..
Today we were sitting on the deck when what we thought were 2 dragon flies mating hovered in and broke apart. It ended up that it wasn’t the sweet cycle of life - but the dark circle of death instead. The dragon fly ended up being a huge red wasp that was carrying a giant red cricket (size of a weta) and had dropped it by accident.. It hovered a bit, grabbed it’s ridiculous sized prey and took off again like a loaded helicopter struggling to pilot the goods.

We were biding our time here with very simple relaxing activities such as;
*Renting umbrellas and sunbathing under them.
*Reading stacks of books
*Drinking fruit shakes and milk shakes
*Swimming the azure blue ocean that was as warm as a bath and as picturesque as only a postcard could be.
*People watching - recommended by us - then following these people about like stalkers behind dark glasses. They all got *names like; Pro wrestler, sparkle butt, Hollywood boobs etc.. you kind of get the drift.

The one activity we will take away as a life memory will be the full day snorkel trip we took. It was absolutely fantastic! We got put on a speed boat and taken to 7 different spots (some in the middle of the ocean) where we got to swim with Sharks ( I was by myself when a 5 foot shark swam beneath me the first time.. makes you a little nervous), amazing giant turtles, many multicoloured fish out of finding nemo and floating through coral. I wish we could have filmed it or taken photos - there is nothing like being by yourself in the ocean and seeing a shark beneath you with our guide trying to feed them fish chunks, or free diving to tail a turtle while it carouses the ocean floor. The water was so clear and the fish were so beautiful. When we got back to the boat after Shark point the guide told us through his language barrier that people have been bitten before.. I’m glad he told us after. When we found the turtle spot the driver told us to get in - so I did - and then he drove off with everyone on the boat. It ended up that I had volunteered myself as a turtle spotter in the deep blue.. That was cool.

It was a real detox week, as the ruling religion here is Muslim - so there is alcohol - but it is really expensive and no one seems to drink - not even the hoard of youngins on their party Island O.E. Instead you order fruit shakes on the beach at sunset - kind of a nice way to end the day. we saved up our Ringgit all week to buy 4 beers on the last night.. wohoooOO!

Leaving was damn hard, but damn easy. You will miss the beach, but you are ready for something new when you've hit groundhog day again. Our ride home was more entertaining than depressing luckily. Once we landed from the fast boat a old crazy looking man approached us and said he would take us to the airport for the same price as a taxi.. I leapt at it straight away sensing a story.
He said wait here, I'll get the car... and about a minute later we got a baby toot - and to our surprise he had a Daihatsu Mira.. it's still a puzzle how we got the packs in with us???
I told him we didn't want to speed to which he replied - good! I like to go slow.. I have many friend who drive fast.. but my car is so small that I always beat them when I squeeze through de trafiiiiic. Then I light a cigarette and wave at them at the end - they hate that!
he was classic - he didn't stop talking the whole way to the airport at 60kmh with streams of traffic constantly overtaking our nana mobile. Some things he told us;
* In 1969 he became a commando and lived in the jungle killing communists.
He worked with men who lived in the jungle. He used a big gun, and they used poisonous blow darts!
* He has seen more in the jungle than we could believe - I believed that straight away - cause he literally had crazy eyes like in some war movie comedy - one was discoloured and the other wonky.
* In the off season Thai Pirates come and steal mattresses for good sleeps from the Perhentain Island resorts.
* They also steal mangos and eat the monitor lizards
* He owns 2 Daihatsu Miras
* He has 3 boats with giant engines
* His full retirement plan.
* When coconuts ripen many people end up in hospital from injuries walking under trees.
* The price of everything we drove past.
* Naughty boys are called naughty boys, not bad boys.

Here is a small example of his story telling to give you a hint of what we got;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bTwusuNJIYg

Tonight we sit in a airport hotel awaiting tomorrows departure to Thailand for our final.. sniff.. final.. Ahhhhh don't say it... 30 days.

Some extra photos of the Perhentians.
One thing I loved about the businesses - is that every sign and advertisement was hand painted - and all the signs looked fantastic and simple - here's a few of my favs;

mmm Burger

This was really cool - It was like the guy had built his little stall/shop out of cardboard.. he probably taped it together every morning

Kuala Lumpur

KL is a powerful city. As soon as you walk in you know it is ALL about money. We were staying pretty centrally and there were 3 giant plaza/malls within a few minutes walk of each other. It was no surprise to find out that there were 65 malls in total... and one of them has a roller coaster inside!

In the 1800s a lot of Indians migrated there, so you find it is a varied place of the 2 cultures and religions - having the Muslims and Hindus. This could also be a reason why alcohol is so expensive. We were walking past bars with happy hour specials of $12 per glass of draft beer or $25 for a jug. . You would be pretty poor after a night on the turps.

We found the best way to see the city was a combination of the monorail and the train system - both being cheap and extending to all the parts you need to see. From the monorail you can catch a birds eye glimpse of KL.. And you go past several interesting places. Two we noted were;
* Electronics dump yard with 1000s of computers, spacie arcade machines and even a couple of cars thrown in for measure.
* A really old derelict prison.. In run down condition and really creepy as it was a contained ghost town with algae and moss growing rampant. I bet it will be a Hotel or something quirky in the future.

Our main target though were the Petronas Twin Towers - which you have probably spotted in movies before - such as Entrapment (1999). you know the one with Sean Connery and Catherine Zeta-Jones.

Here is the upshot - a mind blowing view!

Struggling to get them into the lens 2 streets back.


The sky bridge had free tours - but the sign said the tours were done for the day… so we decided to come back the following morning. Ended up you had to be super quick as we could only get tickets for 5.30 that night.. And although we were motivated initially, the thought of catching 2 trains to get back out there swayed us to go and see the movie Angels and Demons instead. . Not quite the same, but it was the first movie we had seen in 3 months and that gave us a wee escapism thrill.

KL seemed pretty normal really... there were signs of it having a seedy underbelly, but we didn’t run into anything head on. About the weirdest thing I saw was on the first night, we saw this busker painted metallic gold with a python around her neck and 2 pet monkeys wearing fluoro shorts. I kept my distance as those monkeys could be well trained pick pocketers. What happened next was a member of the crowd started hassling one of the monkeys.. . You know, rude names, finger pointing and labelling it for being short and hairy ;) This monkey got really pissed off so the trainer decided to pack things up. She placed the monkey on a sports bag.. But the bag was alive and the monkey was going up and down like a massaging chair. She unzipped the bag and there was another really big python in there just hanging out. Seemed like the monkey and the snakes were pretty good buds though. She packed the second python in that bag and took off. It must be pretty normal and legal here.. But just made me think of how many weird things are being lugged around inside bags in Asia.. . It ain't like NZ where the nasty surprise might be a wet sports towel.

Chiang Mai, Pai and the Golden Triangle

Before we go any further - I just want to apologise for that giant ramble on Bangkok - It was ridiculous and I got a verbal warning from my employer.. so enjoy some piccies instead this time.

Chiang Mai starts with a 13 hour train ride from Bangkok.. and probably our best yet - the food was great, the staff were great and the seats that became beds were really comfortable. We decided to entertain ourselves by watching Bangkok dangerous with Nicolas Cage - I think someone needs to tell him to retire shortly.. ahem.

We arrived early in the morning and it didn't take long before it was sweltering at 41degrees Celsius.. yeow. . since that first morning we adopted a juice bar as our new best friend - serving up any kind of fruit blended with ice for a cool $1.50. It is the low season here and we were literally feeling like one of about 4 farang (fleshy walking tourist ATM) in the city.. there isn't much you can do to cool down but hang in your room.. Mmmm.. that won't do?
We decided to get some hot burning air in our faces and hired a VRX400 motorcycle to take on a day loop out of the city and into the mountains. As you turn off from the main highway you hit the road with all the tourist attractions;
Tiger temple (where that lady recently got munched), snake farm, monkey park, insect zoo, orchids, butterfly zoo (where our friend James Gow ended up to find only 4 butterflies), and a million elephants between waterfall attractions.

I'm not even posing in this shot - This is what everyone looks like when they ride in Asia.. like they just watched happy days with the Fonz

Our first stop on the way was the Mae Sae waterfall. It is a huge area of 10 waterfalls with a snaking walking track (we actually saw a snake on it too) running to the top. You can go swimming and just generally take in the serenity...ahhh, how's the serenity?

This next shot is actually from the centrefold of a adult magazine - I thought I'd slip it in though.

The lovely Desh and I before a medium sized fall

They call these snake branches.

No climbing or sharking please

A little rest spot

We decided to hit some more commercial attractions this time - with the Monkey park. I filmed loads of this - but it is too sad to show. Monkeys performing tricks;
weight lifting, riding bikes, counting numbers.. etc.. instead I will show you the cute monkey we found on the way out.. ain't he something special in video?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3MAuIhL2qgo

We actually ran out of time to do anymore attractions - as the afternoon ticked on and we had mountains to climb on the bike.

The next night we went to the Thai boxing - and man was it awesome! These guys dance in the ring, and the true pros spend more time hypnotising their opponent with their snake like charm gently dancing their poised arms up and down and side to side before striking the deadly blows.

Chiang Mai was getting hot and lazy, so the next morning I went out and hired a Honda Phantom chopper - which is kind of like a sofa on wheels to take us on the golden triangle up to Pai. The golden triangle is a loop that has 1600 corners over a few days.. we opted for 762 over 140kms each way - still takes 3.5 hours or more to get through all the hairpins and S bends.

The roads are great in Thailand, and they maintain them.. not sure about safety though as there is no speed limit and helmets are optional - we opted.


Looks free right - make sure you pack the dental floss to get the insect road kill out.

Pai is an awesome wee town - really really cool. It is a hippy town/commune from way back- slightly developed now, but the core remains. A lot of dreads come this way - and there are even dreaded dread shops to maintain the smelly threads. Rumour has it that cops are really cracking down on the Marijuana situation ( it's in the widn alright ), and conduct random urine tests in bar raids.. the outcome is immediate jail time.

We found a cute little place straight away with bungalows and a swimming pool (much needed). Each bungalow had a theme - and ours was U2.. we turned down the rolling stones for Bono.

Here is a video tour of our bungalow with Ladesha Dromgool on commentary - I think she has a TV career ahead of her;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyS0wTSbMW0&feature=channel_page

and another of the Phantom of Pai in action;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-C0RCwbm20&feature=channel_page

The only problem we had with Pai was power. Because you get the most incredible storms at this time of year - whenever a rain cloud would come near the power would go out for hours.. and we couldn't find anyone who spoke enough English to get a reason why. We did manage to string one explanation together that the town was fed by one wire all the way from Chiang Mai - and the storms were breaking it every day.. whoa - they must have permanent staff up there in dem hills on maintenance.

This leaves one funny last story. We thought we would treat ourselves to a nice flashpacker hotel on the last night.. boy was the room lovely. So we check in about mid day and even borrow a DVD to watch - luxo. So we are chilling under the A/C about 12.30 when the power cuts out.. it was then we find that the water pump is electric too - so no toilet or shower. The power didn't come on until 1.00am when we were fast asleep and checking out early the next morning.. AhhhhhhhhHHHh

This is the alternative power supply in Pai

The storm clouds above us in Pai

A little something in Chiang Mai

We bought this branch of Lychee for $0.50 .. there were so many that I was giving them away on the street and to the staff at the hotel.. I felt like a lychee God

Some Chiang Mai graffiti

The Thai Boxing ring.

Bangkok - Third time lucky!

Our trip begins with a bus ride which we were told would be a big A/C bus called ‘Amazing buses’ from Cambodia through to Thailand. We were picked up and loaded onto a bus full of backpackers and back packs to the brim. There was no A/C but that made it more fun as we travelled with the windows and front door open. About 10 minutes in we drove past an overturned truck carrying several trailers, and since it had fallen in a ditch the last trailer was pointing straight up. It was like a scene from a Simpsons episode as the truck had been carrying about 20million sacks of rice, and there were people with spades trying to shovel it all back in.. yet the truck was still upside down???

After 10 hours we made it to Bangkok. This place is a little like Vegas - it doesn’t sleep and is a lot of fun! You can get anything you want here and the Thais are into having the latest and greatest.. Hot cars, motorbikes and technology. . Whatever.
The bus disembarked on Khaosan Road, and after talking to our new Danish friends - we decided against staying there and instead caught a taxi to a Scandinavian hostel on the other side of town. We managed to talk the driver down to 200baht which is about $10 for a 25minute ride - not bad - but we knew you could probably do better if you haggled for half an hour.
We arrived at the hostel and were told there was only one twin room left - the picture looked O.K so we took it. Well.. The room measured 2metres x 2.5metres (no exaggeration). It had a bunk bed in it, but we took the top mattress down to the floor because the fan wouldn’t cool the top. With the top mattress down you couldn’t open the door to the room - which made it pretty funny for toilet trips.

We didn’t really mind the room at all - but knew we could do better - so the next morning we thought we would head back to the Khaosan area where we knew some nicer places were hidden in the backstreets. Our taxi back cost 150baht - cheaper than the night before, but we didn’t have desperation in our eyes this time. On arrival we hoisted our 20kg packs on and sweated into the back streets only to be disappointed by the absolute filth we were presented with on every guesthouse stop.. I swear you would be lucky if you didn’t see a rat living in your same quarters - plus a bathroom was rare - only unclean shared varieties. We weaved out of the backstreets and into a main road looking for Khaosan direct, knowing we may have to pay more but maybe you could get better?
.. This is the point directly when we run into our Bangkok scam operations..
The background. You are a tourist - you look a little lost, so you run into a nice guy who just happens to be hanging out and is really helpful and genuine. This is the problem.. There are no people out there to help - only people willing to make a $.

So - we run into this guy, man is he nice. I actually approach him and ask about Khaosan, with which he screws his face up and goes - why - why would you want to stay there.. ?? .. I agree absolutely, and we go on from there… he says to go and see the T.A.T (government run tourist agency) and they will sort out hotels, trains, accom in Chiang Mai etc.. and miraculously a Tuk Tuk appears from nowhere to take us where we want to go.. Woah - that was good timing.. Off we go and arrive in the middle of nowhere to a office that doesn’t have T.A.T written on it anywhere.. It does have tourist suckers come here branded on my head somewhere though. After a while we decide on doubling our accom budget and accept what this guy is offering to us.. He even chopped the price several times, which I figured was weird for a government run place, but were 2 hours in the sweaty heat with our packs and this is what happens.. You just do it (as nike says). The hotel actually ends up being really good for the money - bland, but quiet and in a really good area for getting places.. So we weren’t too upset by this.

The hotel had no English channels on the TV which was really good as we were forced onto the streets to find our entertainment - we literally spent 12 hours each day walking around sight seeing and eating.. Crashing back at the room which would spit us back out there the next day.. All good.

The fish in the hotel lobby - hard to take a photo of scale - but she is one big mama.. and kind of lonely looking.


This is our view from the hotel window.. luckily the curtain did black it out.. and we were double glazed... so no noise either - surprised when you're used to the opposite.


This abandoned car is outside the hotel. Bangkok has cool abandoned cars everywhere - more than often they will be a desirable classic in NZ. I saw a really cool lowered tinted Austin 1300 with mags.. covered in dust.. a citroen and even a jag.

After we checked in we found our first mega mall called MBK - it is truly awesome - having had no in your face technology at all for 8 weeks, we welcomed this overpowering stimulating consumer paradise. To kick it all off we had a McDonalds combo each - and we immediately felt sick, but satisfied by the processed nature of it. Then there was floor after floor of shopping.. I mean it was seriously out of control.. And clever - once you got up there it was hard to get back down.. They had actually made it like a one way trap… and trapped we were - as we had found the camera and cellphone level. It consisted of thousands of mini stall parallel importers competing against one another with giant calculators to show their best price. Desh gave us a mission to find a new camera for her which became a lot of fun. By about the 15th stall we had become experts at haggling and the model codes. We had found the camera and it was now time to research - so we navigated ourselves to the internet and cinema complex to see what the net could tell us. To our delight her camera had come in at $200 below retail with memory card and bag thrown in.. so we spent an hour trying to figure out how to get back to the floor below and pay for the new toy. Six hours later and square eyed we found the front door and tottered out to the sky train to hit the Night Bazaar a little down the line. These markets are fantastic, as you can eat in the middle with live music and then get lost in the catacombs later with 1000s of stalls selling everything. After the markets we took the raddest tuk tuk journey yet with our crazy driver belting it down the streets and around the wet corners flatout revving the little hotted up beast and shaking his fist at anyone following the road code.. It was all about getting to the destination the shortest way possible.

MBK - you really can't miss it!



The next day after breaky we thought we would find the Grand Palace and visit this wonder we had wanted to see for some time. Our pessimistic taxi driver a few nights before had claimed that only half of it was made from real gold, and I have a strong feeling he is right - but I like to pretend it is all real for the absolute imagination power.
The Palace of course is cursed for us as we had tried to get there on our last day in Bangkok 3 years ago and had failed due to a scamming taxi driver telling us the road was closed that day and we should take a $100 boat ride instead.. To which we were dropped off in the middle of nowhere, with just enough time to get back to the hotel and fly back to NZ.
Today would be different though, we could feel it. We walked out of our hotel with map in hand and evaded all the Tuk Tukkers hassling us, as we would commandeer our own way to the other side of town - oh yes we would. Our first stop was the train station to buy tickets to Chiang Mai, where we would be greeted with a scene like Slum Dog, with thousands of Thais waiting for their train out.. Here we met a cool station worker who supported our quest to find the Grand palace and affirmed our walking directions to the ferry terminal.

After several kms we reached the terminal and took a express boat down the river to Wat Po terminal (a temple close to the Grand Palace) for $0.50c and it was awesome. The drivers belt down the river flat stick, and when they go to moor up at terminals they just crash into the tyres at speed and then ram the boat up to let passengers off before gunning it out like they are super late. You also get to witness sucker tourists (like us last time) taking $100 long tail boats overpowered with turbo diesel truck engines - seriously cool - when they gun it they leave a rooster tail about 100metres long.

A long tail boat.
Your average long tail power plant.
Express boat
They are always packed.


So we start trudging down the street to the Grand Palace with full confidence - we can see the place fine and it doesn’t look too busy - but it is a public holiday today.
This is when we run into the same problem as the day before. We meet this really nice guy on the street who looks at me in shorts and Desh in a skirt and singlet and says we have 2 problems.
* the first is that we are under dressed - you can’t visit the temple looking like this - which is true - but we also know you can hire clothes there - so it doesn’t really deter us.
* the second is that it is a public holiday and only Thai people can go in today.

So what we could do - grabbing our map, is go to this temple here called Lucky temple and this temple over here called laughing Buddha.. Which are both free today.. And we say to him .. Mmm nah we are OK we will just go walk around here anyway.. When low and behold a tuk tuk turns up right on cue with the driver backing up the same stories. The friendly guy says -- hey - I can get this guy to take you to all these places for 20 baht ($1) which is soooo cheap… and he starts negotiating with this stranger until the tuk tuk goes yeah OK - no problems. So for some weird reason we pile into this tuk tuk only metres from the grand palace and take off with him. Our first stop is the lucky buddha which was sooooo incredibly lame, but we didn’t want to offend his religion, so we told him it was cool. We get back in thinking, sweet we’ll just go to the laughing buddha and then we’ll hit khao san to buy a cool tshirt I’d seen. He stopped outside this shop and said to go in.. then we knew we had a problem. This guy welcomes us and gives us a cup of water each and these baby little straws and then takes us to a negotiation room. We sit down and are thrust catalogues of suits.. I look so disinterested that he says “ you aren’t interested are you?”
“nope, not really, we don’t even know why we’re here”
So he takes us downstairs and tries to sell us this lame bar of soap for $10.. Which we just walk out on.
We’re not too happy with our driver, but he swears there is only one more stop to make at a jewellery shop and then we can go where we want. He tells us we have to pretend for 15minutes and look interested.. We kind of like the idea of this sudden role play opportunity and decide to do it so he can get his 5 litres of gas (that’s why they take you around, the shops offer 5 litres for tourist drop offs). As we enter there is a sign in the lobby saying “has your tuk tuk driver taken you here against your will? If so tell us and we will drop you back” - we took one look at it, sniggered and stepped into our new roles. I tell ya, we were so good that we almost ended up buying some pretty expensive fake stuff there.. But we remained intact and exited with our bank balances sitting at even.
Our tuk tuk guy was excited and so were we -- we stepped in and said Khao San please.. He paused and said - first we must do one more stop. Well, we flipped out and just let it rip.. But they don’t care they’ve seen it all before. We got out and told him to piss off.. Which meant we were now in the middle of nowhere walking down the streets where people were so confused to see us that noone would hassle us - not even the tuk tuk drivers which was really weird. After a long time hobbling about we saw a smelly local bus and hopped on, pointing at Khaosan on the map - to which there was an affirming grin.. So off we went down the strips on the outer regions of our tourist maps. The gears were grinding hard and the ride was cheap as dirt, but sure enough in a babbling of Thai we were told to get off now.

Khaosan Road.


Welcome to Khao San Road. As soon as we entered the street we were 10 years too old. It is backpacker Mecca! Every bar is full of whities drinking hard and Thai staff pretending to have fun with them squealing with joy and taking the baht right out of their hands.

We had a quick late lunch and then headed to the back streets in search of my tshirt (which I never found). This is when we heard “Ladesha!” We turned to see an old friend of hers, Vinnie and his wife drinking at a bar.. That was a great surprise, and we chatted while ‘the beach’ played on DVD behind us (and plays every day at most bars continuously). It ended up being a great run in, as Joy, Vinnies wife works in the travel industry and offered us a 75% discount in train travel throughout Germany.
We hopped onto the rush hour ferry and navigated back to the hotel with ease. At this point we had figured it out.. You can get around Bangkok easily with sky trains, ferries and the public bus.. You Don’t want the tuk tuks because they scam you unless you pay premium to get no stops, and the taxis are on the same mafia system.

It’s now the weekend - and in the weekend is the chuttachuk markets.. Easily the best markets in Bangkok to get anything you want. This place is huge - it is a district by itself accommodating 200,000 visitors shopping per day from 6am-6pm.

The market as you walk around at any time - you can't see anything but people and what's being sold.

In the pet section they were selling chipmunks that wore little hats.. they must have been pretty warm - cause I was.

We loved it -- within 2 minutes I had bought 2 tshirts, and by the end of the day I had 4 t shirts, a singlet and a pair of shorts for less than $60.. Desh had bought a really cool skirt also.
Satisfied and dead tired from the day of markets we took the train to the Paragon shopping mall.. Aha - you can shop again if you are recharged with A/C. This mall is the upperclass version of the MBK I was talking about earlier.. It has all the big brands.. And even has a car dealership on one floor amongst the shops - I’ve included a shot… they had BMW M3s, Porsche turbos, Lotus, Ferrari Scuddarias, and a Lamborghini showroom tinted in black with a black lambo on the floor. The crazy thing is there were businessman in there making deals on the cars.
After dinner we went out to their show area to see the exhibit space - as you can see by the shots it is pretty cool, with this giant white manga like statue beside the stage. A water feature with flying seagulls and what you can’t see is a paddock full of bronze bulls lying and standing in different positions.


This was inside the mall on the 5th floor looking at the car showrooms.
We're in this really cool cafe here in the mall. See the round clear tube above me - it's called a sound tube - you plug your ipod in, and the idea is that sound blasts down the tube which you hear but it doesn't disturb anyone else.

Third time lucky! It is our last day, and we were intent on seeing this grand palace - we knew there was nothing stopping us this time. It was a stinking hot day and we are dressed to cover - jeans, socks, shoes etc.. gasping for air - but sacrificing comfort for show. This is pretty funny - we found a new ferry terminal and there is a sign there that says “there is no lucky buddha and the palace is not closed - be aware of scams” ….Off the ferry and walking down the same strip - being accosted by loads of agents telling us the palace is closed - not open today! Desh turned around and yelled at one of them “hey, have you heard of the tourist police?” .. he stiffened up and said “OK, I am the police” - laughing.. Well, I had to laugh at that one too - not bad.
We finally get to the gate - and guess what, it is a public holiday and only Thais are allowed in!!!
Luckily we were allowed to go in at 1pm - and it was 12.30 - so we found a shady spot and waited while watching other tourists fall into traps talking to street agents.. It really is a big problem here.. Cause we are all suckers and they are very convincing.

Luckily the palace turns out to be an incredible sight and we are awe struck by the brilliant gold finishes and drawn to the sparkling jewels like magpies.

We have a little time left so decide to go to MBK for lunch - damn I love this place.. I am a consumer junky.. One item that I was intrigued by was the iphone mini.. Which I thought must have been a genuine product from apple I’d missed out on until a shop clerk showed me one.. It had a TV inbuilt with a giant metal telescopic tv aerial to boot.. I laughed and backed away - these people can replicate anything - don’t be fooled… it’s fools gold in dem hills.

6pm and boarding a train for a 13 hour journey to Chiang Mai.. A laptop movie, some dinner, a valium and some sleep.

Just a random shot - they do anyone and everything over here
I thought this was quite a cute boy racer sticker.. advertising marine engines

Not your average boyracer car - but hey - they make do with what they can get.